To behave like you own the waves, shouldn't you actually own a wave? Well now you can, with this vial of high quality South Pacific ocean swell. This wave has been sustainably harvested and will give you full local status at all of Raglans points and beach breaks. Includes certificate of authenticity, to prove your local status. (may be subject to some evaporation) 

There's also a FREE hat;

Cardinal/Off-white
Embroidered
Plastic Fastening
100% cotton  
Unstructured
AS Colour